10 Best Walmart Leggings

Best Walmart Leggings in 2023

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On Custody Disputes, Naked Kids, House Rules, and How to Handle Adult Children Living at Home

This parenting advice column attempts to counsel a father regarding his parental rights. We also provide suggestions on how to keep a 3-year-old from going commando and how much control parents should exert over adult children.

Stop here every day for a new question and answer, practical help for busy parents.

Question

Does the mother of my child have any right to keep me from seeing my daughter?

Answer

That's a big question. I'll give you some reasons why she might have such rights:

The above points represent valid legal reasons for denying you access. Aside from those reasons and a few rare exceptions that vary by jurisdiction, your child's mother probably has no legal right to keep you away. However, possession really is nine-tenths of the law. If the woman decides to deny you visitation, and she allies herself with friends and relatives who provide her with a place to live that you cannot physically access, she can probably succeed in keeping you away.

If you want to see your daughter and your ex won't let you, try to talk to her about it. But if she won't cooperate, you have only one remedy - hire a lawyer who will fight for your paternal rights.

Question

How do I stop my kid from walking around the house naked? How do I word, "You're not a Chippendale, so get your clothes back on" to a 3-year-old?

Answer

You stop the boy from walking around naked the same way you stop him from scribbling on the walls or throwing tantrums or beating up his little brother.

The kid is 3. Stop requesting that he change his behavior. That change is your call, not his. And if he doesn't get the point fairly early on, stop trying to explain your reasoning to him. If he's smart enough to understand your rationale at age 3, I encourage you to involve him in this type of discussion. But once you've made the point, it falls to you as the parent to sharpen that point. Understanding is better than ignorance. But in this case, obedience is better than understanding, which will come with time and maturity. You can't afford to wait on a conduct change until the boy understands the myriad reasons why it is a bad idea to run around naked.

Set the rule. Enforce the rule with punishments so he realizes you are serious. Then, after he stops, provide a bit of a carrot to go with the stick, praising him for his maturity and good sense.

Question

If I have a child 18 or older living at home, can I still ask them where they're going, who with, for how long, and when they'll be back? Can I set a curfew?

Answer

Yes and yes. The child may be an adult in the eyes of the law. But in your house, your rules stand. If you want answers to those questions, you have the right to ask them. And if you don't receive satisfactory answers, you have the right to insist on full disclosure and enact penalties to enforce that demand.

But while you have these rights, it doesn't take a professional family counselor to realize that enforcing them may not always be wise. Hopefully, by age 18, your child has earned a measure of trust. Yes, the child is living under your roof, presumably being supported by your money. Yet you cannot afford to forget that child is now an adult. Any rules you set should take the child's maturity - and history of behavior - into account.

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